Thursday, 2 October 2014

Thursday's Random Thought - Ten Commandments of the Coffee Shop

If you live in Canada you KNOW what a “Timmies run” is.

If you are on a weight loss plan you KNOW that the fewer “Timmies runs” you indulge in the better.

The following was circulating all over computers everywhere this week.  I do not know where is originated, but as they say … “Many a truth is spoken in jest”.

If you live in a place that does not have Tim Horton’s … easy … just substitute the name of your favourite local coffee establishment.  I’m sure the same “commandments” apply.


1. Thou shalt not go through the drive-through if you are ordering for your son's entire soccer team. It's called eternity for a reason.

2. Nay but once a week, thou shalt avert thine eyes from the apple fritters.

3. Thou shalt not order 'triple, triple' unless you are under 12.

4. Thou shalt not spend 10 minutes in line with the three whining progeny beget of your loins, and only when you get to the counter utter: "So what does everyone want?"

5. Thou shalt utter no heresies in the temple. The sizes are small, medium and large, not short, tall, grande. If you utter venti, thou shalt be cast out of the temple.

6. Thou shalt hold true that there are no calories in the muffin top. Nay, all wickedness and calories are
cast into the parchment-enclosed nether world. Order two muffins, eat the tops and cast out the bottoms. In this way, a man shall be fed with two loaves and no calories. A miracle!

7. Thou shalt not wait until your order has been rung in before beginning the search for your wallet in that duffle bag you are calling a purse.

8. Thou shalt never order a dozen sour cream glazed, and then ask the clerk for a 'nutrition guide.' For the love of Tim, they are doughnuts, not carrots!

9. Honour thy father and thy mother, and bring them their old-fashion plain.

10. Dieters, thou shall not covet thy neighbour's Boston cream, but rather rejoice for the svelte are few and far between.

So sayeth Tim.

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